Barbie and the Crisis of Identity

 

Below are some scattered thoughts on the new Barbie movie (spoiler alert):

                The movie begins by noting girls used to have to play with baby dolls only until the invention of Barbie. The play thus shifted from play focused on how to care for another to play focused on imagining who one might be and how one might act when they grow up. And while there is good progress in this as a woman’s role on this earth can surely not be reduced to simply mothering, one must note that this change took place in the midst of the larger cultural transformation taking place of thinking of life less in terms of duties to others and thinking of life more in terms of self-actualization. And whereas it is in many ways good to be asking questions of identity, we must nevertheless be cautious of the culture we swim in that more often encourages us to ask, “Who do I want to be?” and less often causes us to ask, “What helpful role can I play in serving the larger community?” or “Do I need to dial back my personal desires/aspirations for the sake of others?”

                As the movie progresses, we see that this hyperfocus on individual identity has brought grave anxiety into the world. We see Ken struggle with figuring out who he really is: his identity search leads him to seeking identity in all kinds of ridiculous fashions, to seeking it in various hobbies (like horses), to seeking it in relationships. Ken’s main identity came from his relationship to Barbie which led him to twin errors of first losing himself in complete submission to Barbie and secondly seeking to dominate Barbie to control her affection for him. This hyperfocus on his individual identity caused him to neither be able to be loved nor be able to love, for 1. He was unable to vulnerably put forth his real self to be loved, but instead could only put forth caricatured versions he thought would gain him affection. And 2. His actions towards Barbie could not be truly selfless love but were selfish acts of wanting to simply use her to prop up his own sense of self-worth.

                Barbie similarly struggles with her identity: will she strive for the “perfections” of her plastic world (which is fake), or choose instead the imperfections of the real world with things like cellulite and doctor visits and death? She wisely chooses reality, and that storyline is important for our modern world where so many seem to prefer to lose themselves in the “perfect” virtual worlds of social media or videogames, instead of living in reality. However, the movie, being secular, cannot seem to imagine that part of our desire for these more perfect worlds is natural and good. As C.S. Lewis said, “If we find ourselves with a desire that nothing in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that we were made for another world.” We long for more than this world offers because sin, death, and decay are not as things should be or as things will be in the end. The Barbie movie seems to opt more for trying to find a redemptive reasoning as to why death is good instead of being able to declare that death is bad.

                The other failing of Barbie is that Barbie’s identity crisis is basically left in existential despair. As Barbie enters the real world, she can finally decide who she wants to be. And Barbie is smart enough to ask the right question, “What was I made for?” And she even asks the right person: her creator, Barbie inventor Ruth Handler. But the movie is unable to give us any answers other than the common secular advice of today: ‘Be who you want to be… Figure it out yourself.’ This is the crisis so many of our young people find themselves in today: stuck trying to create meaning for themselves in what is otherwise a seemingly meaningless world, a creation not designed for any clear purpose.

The Barbie movie seems to offer identity choices primarily focused on placing one’s identity in their vocation: president Barbie, lawyer Barbie, doctor Barbie, supreme court justice Barbie, etc. While the movie raises good concerns about making a world in which these elite places are more gender equitable, the movie is only able to see with a lens of gender equity and not a lens of class equity. What I mean is that the Barbie idea of the good life is finding professional success in a vocation of high salary, high power, or high respect. If that’s what is needed to live the good life, it is only fair that women can take on these jobs as well. And they should be able to. But even if we achieve a majority of women on the supreme court, there are only 9 supreme court justices and 330 million Americans. What I mean is that they are placing the main markers of identity success in various elite, exclusionary institutions that most people will never have access to. Not everyone can be a lawyer, doctor, president, etc. The vast majority of people won’t. If the ‘good life’ is limited to these markers of professional success then you are creating an identity marker that most people won’t live up to, leaving them depressed and bitter. What if one could lift up the value of all kinds of careers, even ones sometimes unfairly looked down upon despite their playing a huge role in serving our communities: janitors, truck drivers, cashiers, etc.? And what if one could realize that one’s identity does not spring from their careers?

The closest the movie gets to this is in suggesting the need to create an ‘ordinary Barbie’. Not one that is based on being pretty or successful, but one that looks like a normal person and does normal things. It’s a somewhat noble idea, but of course it is impossible, because there is no ‘normal’ human. Each person is unique and different. And if you want to feel fully represented in a doll, Mattel will have to make 7 billion different dolls. This is what makes the whole idea of Barbie as an aspirational toy a doomed enterprise from the beginning, because while we can draw inspiration from different people, the goal in life is not to be someone else, the goal is to be ourselves. So much of the issues people have with Barbie could be solved if the marketing was clearer that the dolls do not define the proper ways to be a woman, but merely portray a way or ways to be a woman.

At best, the Barbie movie can help define what our identity should not be found in: relationships, hobbies, or careers, but it cannot answer what our identity should be found in. The truth is of course that the only thing we can firmly ground our identity in is in Jesus Christ. Ken, for example, longs to be seen and loved in the movie, to be (k)enough. That is our ultimate longing. And our identity construction is largely in service of these desires: to earn love from other people. But the gospel of Jesus Christ is that God loves each and everyone of us, and that we don’t have to earn that love, that that love is freely given to us regardless of whether we deserve it. The knowledge of this deep abiding love that God has for us frees us up to focus more on loving others than seeking to be loved ourselves, because we already receive more than enough love from God. God’s love frees us up to be our true selves instead of putting on a show to try and impress others and earn their love. And God’s love for us allows us to be content with our lives even if we don’t have the most amazing career or the perfect spouse or any world-class talents (and even if you do have an amazing career, you will one day retire, if you have an amazing spouse they will one day die, if you have world-class talent, you will one day age and regress; God’s love alone can satisfy us in every high and low, across all time).

Like Barbie, let us ask our Creator, “What were we made for?” And whereas Barbie has no answer, the good news is that the Christian faith does provide an answer. As the Westminster Catechism teaches, “Man’s chief end is to glorify God and enjoy Him forever.” The good news is that we are not left in the existential despair of trying to create meaning for ourselves in a meaningless world.

And in this culture that is so hyper focused on individual identity and self-realization may we end by pondering Jesus’ words that those “who lose their life for Christ’s sake will find it.” Perhaps in becoming a little more forgetful about our selves, in not worrying so much about who I am and how I am perceived, and in focusing more on serving others and sacrificing for others, perhaps in that we will paradoxically start to finally find our selves, find our identity, and find contentment.